Sunday, November 14, 2010
Grocery shopping
Forced to have time off and have no plans to travel with no money has brought a lot of perspective into my life. I have slowed down. There is nothing to rush to. Interesting. Went grocery shopping today and decided to go to a different store further away to get some Presidents Choice Green Curry. Don`t usually go there as it is too far and takes too much time. It was like shopping in a different city. It was like I was on holidays somewhere else. Took time to look around and got some great stuff. Took the time to talk with some of the people working there and it was delightful. Usually, I just ignore the people because I am too busy to bother with them. I only have so many minutes to grab something and run. But not now. You know, I could absolutely love being retired. This is fun. Having my baby finger all huge and bandaged just gives people the in they need to start talking. I have heard so many stories of broken bones, and firewood accidents that it is quite amusing. I would encourage everyone to bandage something up and walk around when you have time. Very interesting.
CRUSHED FINGER
Here is an update. I am healing slowly, it is a little difficult to type. A friend was helping me bring in firewood at the ranch. He was throwing it in the basement window and I was stacking it. I was tired of bending over so stupidly reached for a piece on the top of the pile right when he had just thrown a piece in and it landed on my baby finger. It completely split open and I could see the bone. My wonderful neighbour Angela drove me to the emerg in the Soo and waited with me for hours with her little 2 year old son. It was packed in emerg. They put me on a bed in the hall beside a whole rack of syringes. My friends son though this was great so there was a lot of NO going on. At first , there was no pain. The doctor in emerg kept asking me, It doesn't hurt??? That is not good. After the xrays came back he told me that I would need surgery and that I was lucky that Dr. Woolner , the plastic surgeon was on call. I asked the doctor before the surgery how long i would be off work for. He said 10 weeks to which I emphatically replied, NO I CAN'T be off for 10 weeks, I am self employed, I have to work. Dr. Woolner has a unique bedside manner. He asked me what I did for a living. I said I was a massage therapist to which he promptly replied, Who the hell is going to want a massage from you with metal rods sticking out the side of your finger!!.
I asked not to be put out for the surgery. I asked if they could just give me some twilight and local freezing. The anesthesiologist talked with Dr Woolner and decided they could do that. In the operating room, both arms were out at my sides and I was chatting away. I asked the doctor if he could do a tummy tuck while he was at it or at least take some of my tags of my neck. He said he was sure the anesthesiologist would love to to practice. I was talking away with the anesthesiologist for awhile looking at him on my left side , telling him he looked very young (they do get younger every year don't they) and just having a nice time with all this attention, when I hear a noise on the other side. I look over at my right arm and here is Dr. Woolner with a friggin drill going into my hand. " Wow", I exclaim excited," I don't even feel that!!!" So I got to watch the surgery. I don't remember him sewing up the torn tendon but he assures me that he did. I think I missed a few things in my stoned state.
My friend Celia's husband Michael came to pick me up. Celia and Nancy and Kiesha had gone to close up the ranch in Rydal bank and bring me in some things. They cleaned up nicely as well. Michael went to pick up my pain meds and the ladies came back and got me organized for the night. They sure don''t keep you in the hospital very long anymore. Your sugery is done, you are awake, Ok go home!! Celia asked if she should spend the night to which I replied, No, I am fine!! It is only a pinky. Remember, at this point I had not felt any pain. Well, I awoke at 4 am and called Celia crying, "Please come and take me back to the hospIital, I NEED MORPHINE!! Thepercocet/oxycontin mixture is not working!!." It was not fun. I asked them at the hospital to please just cut it off, but then I realized that would hurt too. The emerg doc didn;t know what to do with me. Gave me 5 needles in my wrist to block the nerves and I told him that did nothing!! He finally froze it and I thanked him profusely. Of course 4 hours later when that wore off, the pain was back big time but by then I got a hold of Dr. Woolner and told him what was going on. He etiquettely replied, "Well, of course it hurts, you smashed the shit out of it. It is going to hurt for at least 10 days", and gave me a script for Morphine to take with the percocet/oxycontin cocktail.
Lucky for me, Celia had just retired and had time for me. She came by the first couple of days every 4 hours to make sure that I took my pills. She just didn't want to go the emerg at 4 am again. And Kiesha stayed at night to take care of me and wash the dishes, and clean up. Between the 2 of them, the dogs got walked and I got taken care of. Lots of gratitude from me for my family and friends. Lots of friends brought by food the first week. That was great, especially the soups which were the only thing at first that I could hold down at first. Morphine doesn't let you eat too much. Totally surprised at how much pain a pinky could cause. I am proud to say that I am now drug free after 10 days. That feels great, very clear headed. That is exactly why I can type this now.
But the problem is no work for 10 weeks, till next year!!! No money, no comp, no insurance, no welfare ( I own a house), no disability( i have rental income upstairs) which helps with the heat and electricity costs but...... WelI , now I really get to sit and look at my spendiing habits. That is one of the big lessons of this injury. Do I really need that THING?? I already have too much STUFF!! (Good job I got that cowboy couch and chair before this happened). The other lesson is I need to take care of myself . I need to heal quickly to get back to work and it will only heal if I feed this body good nutrients and exercise. So i have cleaned up my diet. No wheat, no sugar, no red meat, no alcohol and try to eat organically. Went out with a friend Gwen last night to hear some nice guitar music and had soda water with cranberry juice (she was very nice to pick up the tab) and she commented on how grounded I was. That was nice. I do feel more grounded. Can't run around so much. Trying to get things organized and have the time for that because i cannot work. And I promised myself that I would start walking this week.
Some neighbours and friends rallied together under a friend Elaine to pile some firewood , put up the storm windows and tidy up my basement in Rydal Bank. I am so blessed.
Yes, the universe does provide. So things are well, I suppose. I get by with a little help from my friends. I could sit here thinking why the hell did this happen to me right at Christmas time and feel like a victim, but I have done enough therapy to realize that I am not a victim. I am creating everything happening to me. I just needed a break. Everything does happen for a reason, so I am being thankful for all these lessons. Maybe crushing my baby finger just saved me from a heart attack. I was running so fast. Working out of 2 offices, renovating 2 houses, charging up those credit cards. Only the universe knows, and I totally trust in God, so I am in good hands. Let us enjoy Sunday, the day of rest. Love you all.
PS Kinda of living both in the Soo and sometimes out on the farm now. I feel a little overwhelmed at living alone in the country right now with the wood heat and all so just kind of drifting back and forth and not stressing about having to be one place or the other. Luckily I do still have my place in town that still has furniture in it. One could make a comment about having too much STUFF to fill 2 houses but one won't, right, because that could cause some undue stress. Okay that does bring up one more thing, I do have a Boler trailer for sale if you know anyone who wants one. And I am selling gift certificates for massage for next year!! They make a wonderful Christmas gift. I will be working by then of course. God willing.
I asked not to be put out for the surgery. I asked if they could just give me some twilight and local freezing. The anesthesiologist talked with Dr Woolner and decided they could do that. In the operating room, both arms were out at my sides and I was chatting away. I asked the doctor if he could do a tummy tuck while he was at it or at least take some of my tags of my neck. He said he was sure the anesthesiologist would love to to practice. I was talking away with the anesthesiologist for awhile looking at him on my left side , telling him he looked very young (they do get younger every year don't they) and just having a nice time with all this attention, when I hear a noise on the other side. I look over at my right arm and here is Dr. Woolner with a friggin drill going into my hand. " Wow", I exclaim excited," I don't even feel that!!!" So I got to watch the surgery. I don't remember him sewing up the torn tendon but he assures me that he did. I think I missed a few things in my stoned state.
My friend Celia's husband Michael came to pick me up. Celia and Nancy and Kiesha had gone to close up the ranch in Rydal bank and bring me in some things. They cleaned up nicely as well. Michael went to pick up my pain meds and the ladies came back and got me organized for the night. They sure don''t keep you in the hospital very long anymore. Your sugery is done, you are awake, Ok go home!! Celia asked if she should spend the night to which I replied, No, I am fine!! It is only a pinky. Remember, at this point I had not felt any pain. Well, I awoke at 4 am and called Celia crying, "Please come and take me back to the hospIital, I NEED MORPHINE!! Thepercocet/oxycontin mixture is not working!!." It was not fun. I asked them at the hospital to please just cut it off, but then I realized that would hurt too. The emerg doc didn;t know what to do with me. Gave me 5 needles in my wrist to block the nerves and I told him that did nothing!! He finally froze it and I thanked him profusely. Of course 4 hours later when that wore off, the pain was back big time but by then I got a hold of Dr. Woolner and told him what was going on. He etiquettely replied, "Well, of course it hurts, you smashed the shit out of it. It is going to hurt for at least 10 days", and gave me a script for Morphine to take with the percocet/oxycontin cocktail.
Lucky for me, Celia had just retired and had time for me. She came by the first couple of days every 4 hours to make sure that I took my pills. She just didn't want to go the emerg at 4 am again. And Kiesha stayed at night to take care of me and wash the dishes, and clean up. Between the 2 of them, the dogs got walked and I got taken care of. Lots of gratitude from me for my family and friends. Lots of friends brought by food the first week. That was great, especially the soups which were the only thing at first that I could hold down at first. Morphine doesn't let you eat too much. Totally surprised at how much pain a pinky could cause. I am proud to say that I am now drug free after 10 days. That feels great, very clear headed. That is exactly why I can type this now.
But the problem is no work for 10 weeks, till next year!!! No money, no comp, no insurance, no welfare ( I own a house), no disability( i have rental income upstairs) which helps with the heat and electricity costs but...... WelI , now I really get to sit and look at my spendiing habits. That is one of the big lessons of this injury. Do I really need that THING?? I already have too much STUFF!! (Good job I got that cowboy couch and chair before this happened). The other lesson is I need to take care of myself . I need to heal quickly to get back to work and it will only heal if I feed this body good nutrients and exercise. So i have cleaned up my diet. No wheat, no sugar, no red meat, no alcohol and try to eat organically. Went out with a friend Gwen last night to hear some nice guitar music and had soda water with cranberry juice (she was very nice to pick up the tab) and she commented on how grounded I was. That was nice. I do feel more grounded. Can't run around so much. Trying to get things organized and have the time for that because i cannot work. And I promised myself that I would start walking this week.
Some neighbours and friends rallied together under a friend Elaine to pile some firewood , put up the storm windows and tidy up my basement in Rydal Bank. I am so blessed.
Yes, the universe does provide. So things are well, I suppose. I get by with a little help from my friends. I could sit here thinking why the hell did this happen to me right at Christmas time and feel like a victim, but I have done enough therapy to realize that I am not a victim. I am creating everything happening to me. I just needed a break. Everything does happen for a reason, so I am being thankful for all these lessons. Maybe crushing my baby finger just saved me from a heart attack. I was running so fast. Working out of 2 offices, renovating 2 houses, charging up those credit cards. Only the universe knows, and I totally trust in God, so I am in good hands. Let us enjoy Sunday, the day of rest. Love you all.
PS Kinda of living both in the Soo and sometimes out on the farm now. I feel a little overwhelmed at living alone in the country right now with the wood heat and all so just kind of drifting back and forth and not stressing about having to be one place or the other. Luckily I do still have my place in town that still has furniture in it. One could make a comment about having too much STUFF to fill 2 houses but one won't, right, because that could cause some undue stress. Okay that does bring up one more thing, I do have a Boler trailer for sale if you know anyone who wants one. And I am selling gift certificates for massage for next year!! They make a wonderful Christmas gift. I will be working by then of course. God willing.
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